(noct) ic inbox

[arkitect]

« thirdseat » TEXT ✦ AUDIO ✦ VIDEO ✦ ACTION Emet-Selch ✦ FFXIV
RESIDENCE ✦ tbd
GEMBOND ✦ Emerald

(placeholder text while I set things up ooc) INFO ✦ PERMISSIONS ✦ KINKLIST ✦

Comments

[arkitect]

He did what?!

[There's equal disbelief and anger in his voice, once he finds it again after weighing the enormity of the information. Hermes-- the future Fandaniel, the one who identified the stagnation in the aetherial currents, who led them to their solution to avert the Final Days-- allowed it all to happen to begin with. Used the potential loss of everything they knew, of their lives, as a challenge.]

Whether he remembers or not-- if it was by his choice that we were prevented from stopping it, that such knowledge was taken from us, then he is still the person who chose to do so.

[Just as he won't deny that he is still the person who went to such great lengths to undo what Hermes allowed to happen.]

[soulsees]

I know.

( Hythlodaeus says simply, setting his coffee down again. )

I know. I'm not— this isn't a defense of him or his actions, Emet-Selch. Just a warning that the man you may meet here is already broken, and that he has no idea what it will lead him to do.

( He shakes his head just the once. )

I feel—

( There's a pause, followed by a sigh. )

Well. I knew him, after all. I feel some responsibilty for the fact that I never noticed the pain as it festered within him.

[arkitect]

You could not possibly have expected he would go so far, even if you had seen aught amiss. And why would anyone expect it of him? He was the very chief of Elpis. He had every reason to be satisfied with his work and position.

[It's still somewhat unthinkable, now, that he could have been so malcontent with their world that he was willing to see it break.]

[soulsees]

Perhaps not. That doesn't mean I couldn't have been a better friend.

( Hythlodaeus replies, evidently unmoving in feeling as though he could have done more for Hermes. Perhaps, he thinks, that's why he wants to find him and talk to him — to tell him what happened, to hear more of his thoughts, and to try and understand what it was that opened that void within him.

He can't forgive him, but at the very least he can try to see him. )

... What will you do?

( Wanting to mete out some kind of punishment would be understandable, he supposes, but that doesn't sound much like the Hades he once knew. )

[arkitect]

A better-- his actions killed you, and you're concerned with whether you were a good enough friend of his?

[A harsh interpretation, maybe, but-]

And do not try to soften it now. I know very well it was your choice, but that choice would not have had to be made had he not kept us from stopping it all in the first place.

[As for what he'll do, though... he says nothing of it yet. He's still working through it, still thinking of the shard Fandaniel he knew more recently. He'd thought Hermes' shard ended up quite different from the original soul, but-

Mayhap not.]

[soulsees]

Yes.

( He says simply, closing his eyes for a long moment before turning to Emet-Selch again. )

My death was part of my past— part of a world that no longer exists, and a life that is no longer mine.

( His breath catches in the back of his throat, and for a moment the raw emotion of finally saying the words aloud threatens to overwhelm him. )

I don't forgive him. I can't. But to hold on to that pain would destroy me, and now that my soul has found yours again— Stars, I want to live. I want a future. I need to take responsibility for what I did wrong, that I might never allow such a thing to happen to us again.

( A smile touches the corners of his lips, soft and sad. )

I need to do this.